Lately, I have been spending too much time on the third level, with all the little piggies. Granted its been for a good cause. Employment opportunities just don't fall in your lap, sometimes you have to go after them. I have decided, that in order to find the drooling beast that is a new job, I will have to hunt for it. That journey of a thousand applications has begun in earnest, on the interwebs where I find myself among the legion of faceless, internet users, just trying to find a way to make an honest buck.
I've always hated the search for jobs. It leaves me with a sense of unyielding stress. The endless searching for that one chance to stick my foot into the entryway of some sort of reputable establishment my most recent foray into the financial world has proven to be, for lack of a better word, taxing. The financial gods do not show favor with me and have cast me out of their fiscal paradise. leaving me to travel the wilderness of employment. A "Mad Max" if you will. Armed with a stunning resume, rugged good looks, and a willingness to try anything once, How can I lose?
WELCOME TO THE THUNDERDOME!
As it turns out, I have to fight for the positions I want and be able to defeat the terrible foe that is the "Pre-Employment Questionnaire"My oldest foe. My nemesis. the Moriarty to my Holmes. Your broad covering, generalized questions make me want to vomit, and explain myself in great detail. Not everyone is cut from the same cookie-cutter cloth you Briggs-Meyers devotee bastard. I'll be the best employee you'll never have. And so, here I am, striving to achieve the golden ring that is the American Dream. Wondering if the apocalypse will come before my next interview and save me the trouble. I have my zombie attack plan ready to implement in the case that the dead, however slowly, begin to walk the earth. In which case, if video games have taught me anything, I am sure to come out on the other side a bright, shining example of #winning
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